Essay Dialogues #5: A Student Reads His Common App Essay In Class

In a high school English class, JACK, tall and confident, reads his Common Application essay in front of the class.

JACK: “Helping that family rebuild their home after the fire was — ”

SABRINA, knows everything, raises her hand.

SABRINA: Ms. Arnold? Can I make a comment?

MS. ARNOLD, sixties, was ready for retirement ten years ago, looks sternly at Sabrina.

MS. ARNOLD: Let him finish, Sabrina.

SABRINA: But his essay is all wrong.

MS. ARNOLD: Why is that?

SABRINA: His opening sentence didn’t pull me in.

AUTUMN, pugnacious, pipes in.

AUTUMN: And he’s telling and not showing.

EVAN, an overweight sage, speaks with authority.

EVAN: He’s trying too hard to be funny.

JORDAN, it’s all about the designer, fires back at Evan.

JORDAN: My essay tutor said humor is okay.

AUTUMN: Mine said to stay away from it.

SABRINA: He’s also selling himself.

EVAN: And he’s repeating things from his activities.

JORDAN: His vocabulary is too dull.

EVAN: His sentences are too short.

SABRINA: His paragraphs are too long.

MS. ARNOLD: Students, stop! I know you are all experts on the college application essay. But let’s allow Jack to finish reading and then we can discuss it. Jack, will you — ? Jack? Where did he go?

BEN, soon to develop a billion dollar app, replies.

BEN: Jack left. He said he was gonna join the Air Force.

For help with your Common Application Essay, contact Craig Heller at 818-340-1276 or [email protected].

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